Year End Review - 2013

As 2013 is finally over, it is time to review the best movies released this past year. As usual Politics and Sports dominated again. This year movies for the international audience were a bare minimum as the Indian audience concentrated on the domestic market.

Here is the list of the major blockbusters of 2013

The rise of the BJP

Starring: Narendra Modi, Rahul Gandhi, Manmohan Singh

The most talked about and watched movie of 2013 was about the rise of one man as the best PM candidate for India. A power-packed performance by Modi and a lack of performance from veteran actor MMS were the most talked about features. An excellent comedy performance by Digvijay Singh also had the audience in raptures.

Overall: 4/5

The Legend

Starring: Sachin Tendulkar

A tremendous performance by the evergreen superstar made this movie bring tears into the eyes of every Indian. Easily one of the classics for an entire generation, 2013 will be remembered for this movie. Even other stalwarts like Gavaskar and Dravid went unnoticed by the performance of India’s greatest entertainer. 

Overall:  5/5

AAP Jaisa Koi

Starring: Arvind Kejrival, Sheila Dikshit,

This low budget multiplex movie was the revelation of the year. The young audience entirely lapped up this new generation cinema. This David vs. Goliath movie had a simple story but surprised the audience with its excellent technical skills and innovative marketing. A special mention to Arnab Goswamy for a special comedy narrative that was the backbone of the movie.

Overall: 3.5/5

Mission Mars

Starring:

This mega budget Sci-Fi movie was at last released in 2013 after lots of delays and cost overruns. Shot in a grand scale, the technological brilliance of the movie ensured its success without any major star cast to speak about. Although it might not be able to recover its huge budget, it is worthy of a mention here.

Overall: 3.5/5

Candy Crush Saga

Starring:

This animation movie was a hit with both kids and adults alike. With simple but colorful graphics and an excellent soundtrack, it had people glued to the screen. This movie like most good animation movies will continue to be liked until the next good movie comes up.

Overall: 4/5

Young Guns Blazing

Starring: Virat Kohli, Rohit Sharma, MS Dhoni

This young and peppy sports film was an instant hit with the Indian masses. As upcoming actors took the stage, this entertainer won the hearts of many with its racy scenes and heart stopping action. Though definitely not a classic, it was an excellent one time watch. This movie also saw the end of veteran actors like Gambhir and Sehwag.

Overall 3/5

Chess Masters

Starring: Magnus Carlsen, Vishwanathan Anand

This slow paced movie made for a niche intellectual audience managed to get new viewers because of its thriller like suspense and commanding performances. Though the ending was not as most people expected, this movie proved that audiences still appreciate such performances.

Overall: 3.5/5

Digital Democracy...

Everyone says greatness can come from anywhere. But I am sure nobody imagined it coming from a cubicle in an IT company surrounded by 800 other such cubicles. That is my story of greatness, of almost greatness.

Everyone likes to dream. Not many like to work for it. So I hit upon the perfect plan, big dream with small work required.

I intended to join politics. The dream ended at Prime Minister but the plan ended at becoming an MLA. The strategy was simple, do what I am best at – fooling around with my laptop and my phone. All knowledge was on Google, time and a fast internet connection was given by my company (they even pay me for it).

First the research. I searched for the youngest and most metropolitan constituency in Bangalore. Found it. A random search on Google got me enough phone numbers to start off.

Then the content. Copy paste from a few election manifestos and from a few political bloggers and I am a visionary, the next big hope of India. Open Photoshop and I look like the next Rahul Gandhi. Soon I had a blog with my vision, my passion and my reaction waiting for a bit of interaction.

It was time for execution. No door to door campaigning for me. A nice peppy message on We-Chat announcing me as the next big thing with the right amount of smileys and a link to my blog and my campaign in underway. Somebody always forwards everything!

To be great, you can’t just rest after the start. Staring at the blog-counter on your blog cannot be counted as work. One has to persevere. So I put it on Facebook, on Twitter, on LinkedIn and even on Orkut. Why take a risk!

I might have lost my zeal had it not been for the comments and re-tweets I got. Most of them thought I was being funny or stupid but hey, nobody said I was being corrupt or dishonest. I was on the right track.  I followed up my initial post with a renewed appeal. To forward, mention or re-tweet my message to everyone who lives in my constituency. And people were responding. Well, my offer of 24/7 supply of Candy Crush lives might have helped a bit. But it is good marketing. Soon I had a group of people from my constituency genuinely interested in me. I think I got my first vote.

I read a few blogs on digital marketing and a few more on politics and I knew exactly what my constituents needed. They wanted engagement, a full time connect with their representative. Who better than me to give it. Me who feels naked if my mobile or tablet is not at my side.  So I started researching again, scanning Google for any issues in my constituency, trolling twitter for any topic my voters might have a connection with. From a Dominoes outlet which does not deliver on time to a monkey that steals fruits from little girls, I now knew all the problems. So I kept on posting them and messaging them, offering solutions. The solutions were ready made. When I have the whole world at my fingertips, there are not many problems whose solutions cannot be found. As more people became engaged, more and more joined in.

Now initiative can take you so far. The rest of it comes from investment. Now that I felt I had a realistic model, I began investing. And the opportunities for someone with a credit card (borrowed) on the web are limitless. I began promoting my posts on FB, mobile ads in Google, geo-fencing SMS’s and the whole gamut. I even began paying for my own PR. I was getting famous enough. People were discussing me and promoting me. I got myself a hashtag on Twitter, I had my own videos posted on YouTube, my presentations on SlideShare, began posting relevant images, a few search keywords on Google would even pull up my name.

But was all this enough?  Will people vote for me or was I just an entertainment package? I had to provide more value somehow. I came up with the idea of a mobile application just for the constituency. Where everyone can register, send their complaints, however small, upload images, and keep track of all money spent from public funds.

That worked. Everyone was impressed. My followership was growing. I was getting volunteers to spread my message. The local news and print media picked it up. Elections were round the corner and my name was being bandied around. And I had not yet left my desk in office. A few posters with my name started coming up. My blog was my election office, my FB page was my stage and my We-Chat was my mike. Without moving from my seat I was an integral part of the democratic process.

Some dreams can come true. Some couch potatoes can move towards greatness. Like me.

Mobile marketing your next election.

More than half the population of India now own mobile phones. Barely half the population of India cast their vote. If half of all the mobile phone owners have never voted, you are staring at a huge potential customer base just waiting to be tapped. A market at your ready reach, a market one can engage sitting at ones desk in an air-conditioned office. A customer who is connected to you 24/7. It is an opportunity any political party would be stupid to ignore.

For winning elections in the end boils down to selling yourself, as an individual, as a party, as a brand. The government of any country is its biggest service industry. And in India’s multi party democracy, the number of ants trying to bite into this massive pie is copious. As in any service the essential idea is to understand what the customer wants and to deliver it efficiently. So how does one engage the mobile customer and motivate him to vote for you in an election.

Just as in retail, you have to first get the customer to the shop before you can make him to choose your product. Initially you have to convince him that his voting matters and is required for his own wellbeing and betterment. In marketing parlance it is called “creating a need”

This is where mobile applications play a big role especially among the educated smart phone or even low range phone users. It is not practical to get somebody to go, stand in queue and vote as an impulse. It also cannot be incentivized in any way. “Vote tomorrow and get 50% off in the next elections” will just not work. It requires constant engagement and motivation so that the message can gradually sink in. This is where social media applications can really be effective.

Mobile applications, be it extensions of web based platforms like Facebook, Twitter or Google or exclusive mobile platforms like We-Chat or Watsapp can keep users constantly interested by providing a huge variety of content which he or she can choose and interact with. For marketing any service or product on social media, there are certain parameters that mainly define the effectiveness of the campaign. They are:

·         The relevance of the content.

·         The consistency of the message.

·         The gratification it provides – how interesting it is.

·         Differentiation from existing content.

·         The regularity at which it is communicated.

·         The scope for interaction and feedback.

·         The ease of sharing.

When a message, be it a general call to take part in the election process as an appeal to ones responsibilities as a citizen or a specific campaign to vote for a single individual or party will have to stay true to these values to succeed. Ensuring that the user is not overburdened on his time while at the same time being able to provide him enough quality content regularly to change his opinion is a challenge, but not insurmountable. If effective, mobile applications will provide unlimited reach due to the ease at which content can be shared between people. Positive or negative, on opinion can spread within hours to thousands and lakhs of people.

For the content to be relevant, one has to ensure that it reaches the right audience. While in regular Social Media like Facebook and Google, one can depend on demographic and interest based targeting, most apps depend on the user’s judgment to share relevant content to the relevant people. This ensures that information remains credible to a certain extent as well as that there is a human sanction for all content shared. Over mechanization and repetition of any message shall directly affect its credibility and can create the exactly opposite effect to what was intended.

In summary, the digital generation, be it the early adapters or the new entrants are a fickle lot. Digital content does not share the credibility as yet of any mainstream medium and thus influencing opinion is still a huge challenge. But the potential is obvious and any stakeholder in the electoral process should be vary of ignoring this medium.  

Written for a contest on www.indivine.com

Broken Dreams with a Brilliant Tab!!

I looked forward to my first tab like I might look forward to my first wife.
Now your mobile might be your girlfriend, you do not mind changing it, options available are numerous as long as all basic functionalities remain. Your laptop is your best friend, you do not notice the better versions until this one stops performing. But you tab is like your wife, simply because there are just not many options available at reasonable price to be your girlfriend, and it just hasn’t been around long enough to be your best friend.
So I decided to buy a tab. To be mine and only mine, to spend time with me, to put me to sleep showing me a movie or scrolling through a book for me. To expand my energy, to play the High Definition games or browse through the Heavy Duty websites. To come home to after a hard day in college. How glorious it seemed.
After months collecting the money and days torturing the website to deliver on time, at last the tab was mine. At last my big fat wedding was over. The first night was beautiful. It was mine, mine only. It responded to my every touch, was excellent in any position, gave me options no phone ever could, had unmatched performance and unreal possibilities. We were supposed to be together happily ever after.
“Dude, let me check it out, haven’t used a tab before”
“Man, the games are awesome I am sure, let me play just one game.”
“Why don’t we all just watch a movie together on it.”
Some things are just not meant to be. In a Men’s hostel, most things are not meant to be. It’s no place to bring your wife. Everybody wanted a piece of my tab.
“My phone is not big enough to play properly, hand it over for a sec.”
“That video, I need to show it to someone. Be back in a minute.”
If one could run a kilometer on Temple Run, there was always someone to try and run a few meters more. It someone found watching YouTube on it cool, somebody had to watch an HD movie on it. If it was somebody’s newspaper, it would become somebody else’s chess board in a minute.
“Hey it’s yours anyway, let me use it for a few hours.”
“Oh, you will be sleeping soon, will return it tomorrow.”
“Dude, that lecture is going to be boring. Am taking the tab to pass the time.”
In a few months my wife was no longer mine. It was just too adaptable, too functional to remain chained to one man. That unlucky man was me. Soon I never came to know where it spent the night. Soon it was leaving my side without me even knowing. Soon I could sleep with it besides me and wake up with it gone. It was maybe just too good for me.
Today it has seen it all. From my intense possessiveness to a mob’s violent sharing. But it goes on, pleasing anyone who touches it. Today that which was meant for my personal touch is found in different hands every day. Sleeps somewhere and wakes up somewhere else.
“Man, we would have been so bored without your tab.”
“The time we spend fighting for the tab. Awesome fun…”
“That’s some excellent technology there. Made just for us!!”
It was just not meant to be. Me and my tab in a college hostel. It was one failed marriage but life goes on. I would not replace it for anything else.

Post written for contest on www.indiblogger.com

All entries must have a link to facebook.com/LenovoIndia it seems....

Rahul Gandhi, waste or wasted....

Leaders might be born, might be made, might happen by accident or by necessity, but to expect leadership by sycophancy is stretching it. To shout from rooftops that somebody, who has neither the upbringing nor has shown the intellectual ability to lead a party, leave alone the nation, is the next big hope of the nation will not make him a good leader. To accept everything he says blindly, keep him away from any criticism even if he takes positions against his own government, to simply hand him responsibility without accountability will in no means get him ready to lead a nation. Not now, not ever.
While both have failed the nation, it’s a matter of debate if Rahul Gandhi has failed the Congress or the Congress has failed Rahul Gandhi. Yes, sometimes leaders have to be made, potential candidates have to be groomed, initiated gradually into their roles, allowed to make mistakes so that they can learn from them so that at a give point, when they are ready they can take over and lead. Rahul Gandhi could have been that person, groomed from a young age to understand the country whose history has been shaped by his family, and take it forward. The Congress had the senior statesmen, the Pranab Mujherjees and the Manmohan Singhs, the Sheila Dikshits, who could have taught him the nitty-gritty of running a country responsibly and efficiently. Leaders who have a wealth of experience as well as the personal integrity to show a young man the ways of government. To discipline him and gradually give him responsibility, teaching him first to follow before he learns to lead.
And he would have had a good team to assist him and grow with him. The Milind Deoras and the Sachin Pilots could have been his peer group, a group of young men ready to take on the mantle of India’s oldest party when the time is right. Men with vision and a connect with the young Indian, but with the experience and political discipline imparted by older leaders. They might not have been baked in the oven of grass-root politicking but would have learnt enough to lead.
Now who do we blame for such an ideal situation passing us by? Do we blame the same elderly statesmen who were unable to hold their hand up and take responsibility for this young scion, unable to find the steel to discipline a Gandhi, be it the mother or the son? Do we blame the overpowering queen bee, for whom politics has been about power, about being able to shield her fallacies and her personal ambitions under a cloud of opaqueness and ultimate authority? Who could never have the confidence in her heir to work his own way without her pampering and carte-blanche to do whatever he pleases. Or is it all the fault of Rahul himself, a young man who has never shown any propensity for leadership, for discipline or responsibility, whose youth is a story of failed academics and partying ways, who even at forty plus has difficulty maintaining intelligent conversation. Was he always destined to be a failure, no matter how hard the rest tried?
Nobody in these times expect political decisions to be taken keeping the country in mind. Neither are decisions on leadership going to be based entirely on the ability of the individual. But for the Congress to pin its entire hopes, with head and heart on a person who has shown absolutely no potential, no propensity to improve speaks of a depravity of ideas unbecoming of any party, leave alone the Grand Old party. It is as if by screaming long enough and loud enough, reality can be fooled and Rahul might one day turn into the great leader the Congress is waiting for.
Sad is it not?

The West will wait....

An old post for my college blog. Still relevant.

For all the hoopla around the entrance in FDI in retail and other sectors, we Indians have not fully comprehended the reasons the west is in such a hurry to set up shop in our country. Like us, the western countries are just as protective and just as concerned about their own economies. The protective nature of the west might be hidden behind their investments and technological advances but the fact is the east is no longer just important to sustain western economies and their way of life but a necessity without which they will no longer be able to sustain their rising expectations and popular demands.

The capitalistic economic model sustained for so long has been based on growth and rising demand. An expectation the slowing growth rate of the west has not been able to sustain. This model of investment by taking up huge credit in order to grow requires that companies need to keep growing at a certain rate or they will implode. Be it growth in terms of GDP, population growth or growth in consumer demand, the developed world has reached a saturation point. The economic crisis we see today are just manifestations of this saturation. Manufacturers need to produce more, retailers need to sell more, banks need to invest more. But where will the demand, the raw materials and the labor required come from? The developing world can provide all this and more. But unlike the earlier centuries the west can no longer grab what they want by sheer force, they will have to participate in the development.

To the west India and China represent opportunities to keep their domestic population satisfied by giving them opportunities to grow. The sheer numbers in terms of potential purchasing power that these two economies together have is what drags them to us. That is why even though domestic incomes are dropping and unemployment is rising, multinationals are encouraged to invest in India and invest heavily. Companies know that if they can successfully leverage their international experience while at the same time adjust to local conditions India and China can rescue them from stagnation or even decline in their home markets.

Every sector in the country is in a nascent stage with potential for new entrants and ideas. While there are latent inadequacies in Indian infrastructure and decision making processes, the gradual opening up of the economy has given foreign companies time to study the market and the Indian customer. The young, upwardly mobile population ensures a market receptive to new ideas and brands. Unlike China, India has a stable political and social structure and have democratic institutions similar to the west. Thus engaging India makes not only economic sense but also strategic sense. The Chinese economy might be attractive for its size and efficiency but come inherent with risk. The Chinese model of huge investments in infrastructure and a controlled currency is untested and is considered unsustainable by many leading economists. India meanwhile follows a tried and tested model of organic growth both in infrastructure and in supply-demand growth.

If the Indian government can ensure continuity and consistency in reforms, there will always be companies willing to invest in Indian no matter how slow or regulated the reform process is. India represents a long term strategic investment to them. Thus it remains imperative that we take a slow and steady path to opening up the economy ensuring growth without effecting local industries. The opportunities globalization and the world economic system has thrown at us need to be utilized to solve our internal deficiencies. Corruption and infrastructure bottlenecks will have to be addressed.

They need us more than we need them. Something we would do well not to forget.

Why minorities should vote for the BJP

The Ishrat Jahan case may have judicial authenticity but no one can argue that the timing and the blatancy with which the government is pushing it is a purely political move. With elections around the corner, it it time for all parties that cater to minority vote banks to start consolidating them. Such consolidation is easiest done by polarization. With the BJP unwilling to play the Hindutva card openly, the onus has come one the so called secularists to rekindle communal animosities and insecurities so as to retain and collect all those opposed to the BJP-RSS brand of Hindutva. It is high time the grassroot minority voter saw through this.
Any community, be it individually or collectively expects two things from a democratic government, development and empowerment. In other words mental and material upliftment. Now while the majority, in this case the middle class and socially upward classes, mainly Hindus, have had development, they have always found themselves on the short end of empowerment due to the pandering of minorities by decades of pseudo secular governments. At the same time, the minorities have not gained the necessary development and thus get solace from what they feel is empowerment. Their propensity to vote as a block and show their strength in numbers has led to them having major roles in political battles, their chosen leaders holding major political posts and enjoy being pampered during elections.
But their political masters understand that these minority cross sections will only remain a malleable vote bank if they continue to lack development, essentially education and a good standard of living. Because as soon as a person gets educated and is no longer having to commit all his faculties for his day to day existence he begins to think on his own. He gains the confidence to take his decisions based solely on his convictions. He then becomes an individual and not just a herd animal who can be influenced only by generalizing his caste or religion. Thus he ceases being a vote bank. Which politician will want his well cultivated herd to disperse by providing them such development. Any dissatisfaction is papered over by blaming the majority and thus polarizing them even further.
An example of this is the state of Kerala. North Kerala has a dominant Muslim minority while the south has a dominant Christian minority. The Muslims of the north are catered to by openly Muslim political parties like the Muslim League and the Indian National League. They are the beneficiaries of the entire Muslim vote and no government can be formed without the support of one of these parties. Thus Kerala Muslims have always had their leaders in plum ministerial posts with their parties having the power to make or break governments. But this power has not resulted in development. They still remain poorly educated and with lower standards of living than the average. Mistrust and hatred is high and communalism is an ever present danger. Their leaders are served by keeping them alienated from the majority and ensuring that they do not gain the education to question them.  Compare this with the south where the Christians do not have a political identity of their own. By joining the political mainstream they have ensured that to get their votes, politicians have to cater to their individual wants and have thus ensured prosperity and development. They might not have politicians clamoring for their votes or leaders just for them but they have ensured that the fruits of progress have not passed them by. They cannot be separated from the majority today from a political perspective.
Thus we find that it is those who claim to champion the cause of minorities who have the least to gain from their upliftment. From a national perspective the only party that has anything to gain by educating the minorities and bringing them into the national mainstream is the BJP. The BJP with its ideological foundations as an upper caste Hindu entity cannot appeal to the minorities by playing to their vanity or ego. The BJP has in the past tried to polarize the majority vote and make them vote en-bloc too but the middle class is already past that stage of blind following. Their only option is to break the herd and appeal to the individual voter. Their only choice to attain a decisive majority is to break apart or neutralize the minority political blocks. By thus breaking the chains of minority appeasement the BJP can also cater to its core constituency by providing them with more empowerment. Its only when every person votes individually that an ideology accepted by the majority can prosper. This can only be done by giving them development as an alternative to the pseudo secularism that gives them a sense of power but nothing else. Education, opportunities and security should be the priorities that must be valued.
Even though the BJP as a party, being cast from the same mold of vote bank politicians hasn't yet completely realized this path that they should take, there is a change in the wind. A lack of an alternative to gain more vote share has resulted in every BJP state government having to concentrate on development as their only election plank. There is no reason to believe that at the center their policies will be any different. These is no reason to believe they will have an alternative.
All this and more reason for everyone in the minority, who feels left out in the Indian growth story to give the BJP a chance. The alternative is only more of the same. Who is communal and who is secular is a question that has to be answered consciously as per the realities of the day. An individual perspective is the only way forward for a responsible democracy.

The Prime Minister needs a job…

Not many people at the non descript pub in central Delhi noticed the old sardar sitting in the corner and quietly sipping some Italian wine. But this correspondent with a keen eye for detail recognized him instantly and went up to him to have a conversation. He was none other than Dr Manmohan Singh, the Prime Minister of our country.
“Good Evening sir, may I join you.”
[silence] (Confirmation that it is indeed Dr Singh.)
“Sir, what are you doing sitting here alone in this place without any of your security detail or party colleagues? Is something wrong?” [silence again]
I had to try a different tack.
“Sir, what do you have to say about the latest scam that has hit your party?”
At the word scam Dr Singh automatically sat upright and noticed me. In a voice sounding more like a recording, he broke his silence. “I was not aware of what was going on. I am not involved in any way. There is no need for me to resign.”

“Sir, I do not want you to resign. Can we just talk for sometime?”

“You don’t!! Well then, okay. Sit down.”

“But what about your security detail? How did you manage to evade them and come here?”

“Oh, that’s easier than you think. All I had to do was smile at them on the way out. They instantly thought it was some nephew of mine and let me leave. They haven’t seen me smile for 9 years you know. Even the auto driver was getting suspicious but I simply started talking to him. Even he knows that the PM of India doesn’t speak.”

“But won’t they question you when you get back?”

Dr Singh actually had a smirk on his face.

“Son, you underestimate me. Let them question. I will just keep silent. I might even tell them ‘I was not aware of what was going on. I am not involved in any way. There is no need for me to resign.’”

“But Sir…”
“Don’t worry young man. I barely recognize myself when I speak. Leave alone anyone else”

“But what are you doing here sir?”

“Oh I needed a quite place to ponder over some matters of grave importance.”

“The state of the country?”

“No, something more important. I was considering my employment options next year when I am dismissed from my current job. Surely you don’t think the Congress has any work for me when out of power?”

“No, but why don’t you retire and spend time relaxing at home?”

“What do you think I have been doing for nine years! A sardar gets bored being silent.”

“But sir, you are an eminent economist. You are supposed to have the best CV in India.”

“Yeah, but every employer will give maximum weightage to the last job. Even Einstein won’t be able to justify that. There are just no jobs matching my skill sets anymore. What a waste of all that studying and research. In fact, you know I googled my name just to check. The fact that I am an economist appears on the 13th page. I almost cried.”

“But surely there will be lots of options for you.”
“Where are the options? Even Big Boss refuses to have me on their show. Serials refuse to give me a role even though I can waste years for them. My agent tells me advertisers want moving actors and not posters anymore. The silent monks of Thailand, the ones in the Hangover movie did invite me, but they expect me to shave my hair.”

“Why don’t you start something on your own?”

“Oh I have exhausted all my ideas teaching that good for nothing Robert Vadra how to make money. I did think of buying an IPL team, but then my contract with the Congress does not allow me to invest my money back in India. Football is too violent for me, or else there were a few Italian football teams up for sale. In fact the best offer I got was from the Indian Association of the Deaf-Mute as president and CEO but when I asked about the money they refused to hear or speak.”

“But sir, you do have a lot of money.”

“Did you just say money? I repeat ‘I was not aware of what was going on. I am not involved in any way. There is no need for me to resign.’”

“That is okay sir. It has been a pleasure talking to you. I hope we will meet again the same way. By the way, do you mind if I publish
this conversation.”

Dr Singh guffaws loudly. He is genuinely laughing now.

“Son, go ahead and publish all you want. Nobody will believe I spoke so much and for so long. If anyone does care, I will just tell them that ‘I was not aware of what was going on. I am not involved in any way.

Gayle to retire from IPL, to enter Indian politics.

In an exclusive interview with me at the Kingfisher Club, Bangalore, Chris Gayle made the shocking announcement that he is going to retire from the RCB with immediate effect and join the Congress party. Mr Gayle was completely lucid and even counted till 180 in multiples of 6 to prove the point.

True to his newly found calling, Mr Gayle patiently replied to every question I could come up with.

Why this sudden decision and what are the reasons for it?

Mr Gayle: This decision is by no means sudden. I have been pondering over it for a month now. It has been occupying my mind every time I hit a ball in the air and it takes ages to come back down. So I have had a lot of time to think about it for the last one week. Politics looks to me a natural career progression for someone in India who is famous. Though Bollywood was tempting, even John Abraham these days is trying to learn how to cry. Which is impossible for me. So I chose politics. Politics will provide me the adulation, the money and most importantly give me something to laugh about every night when I come back home.

But why now?

Mr Gayle: Seeing the number of seats a political rally in Bangalore can fill and the number of seats I can fill at the Chinnaswami, I believe this was the right time to join the fray. I believe I can save the Congress who is trying its best to lose from a winning position here in Karnataka. Maybe my only chance of a victory in the next few years. I had to seize the moment.

And also that young creep Virat was getting on my nerves. Before he pisses me off too much by swearing at me and I lose my Indian fan base by banging up the future Indian captain, I felt it was time to move on.

But why the Congress?

Mr Gayle: Once one has chosen a career path, the next important thing is find the right employer. For a beginner in this field, the Congress policy of a complete lack of policy seems the easiest way to begin. Also the pressure of performance is non existent, even frowned upon. After having to single handedly carry a team and its overweight boss on my broad shoulders, it is a welcome relief.

But what about the Modi phenomenon?

Mr Gayle: As I was saying, by joining the Congress I am under no pressure to go head to head with a leader of that stature. They have Rahul for that. That is, unless they decide to get rid of Mr Vadra and I change my name to Mr Gayle Gandhi. I can easily remain happy making the odd thousand crores here and there while Mr Modi tries to change the country.

How do you think you will manage working under Rahul Gandhi?

Mr Gayle: I believe taking orders from Siddharth Mallya for four years is sufficient experience to tackle the Gandhi scion. Also he had a Columbian girlfriend. I can relate to that.

But what will you do if you lose the next election?

Mr Gayle: Oh I believe I can keep myself occupied by being the official bouncer for the opposition in parliament. It would be just as interesting as hitting Indian medium pacers out of the Chinnaswami. Also I could use my accent to good use as an official spokesperson. They are not supposed to be understood, I believe.

Mr Gayle, where do you see yourself ten years down the line?

Mr Gayle: That is the beauty of the Congress party and another reason why I chose them. Depending on one’s likes and dislikes, there is a role for everyone in the Congress. If I choose to shoot my mouth off, I could be the foreign or the law minister. If I want to be clever and make some good money, I could end up as the finance or telecom minister. If I can stay silent and show no emotion at all, I could be the prime minister of India in no time. The opportunities are endless. Even if I do absolutely nothing, I am at least sure to end up as a Governor or maybe even the President. What else can one ask for?

So, do you not see any loss in this decision you have taken?

Mr Gayle: You mean, the booze, the cheerleaders, and Priyanka Chopra? I think I will manage. Booze and cheergirls I heard are part of politics too these days. As for Priyanka, in true Indian spirit, I intend to keep my personal life personal.

Thank you, Mr Gayle, for being so forthcoming. I am sure the Indian public is looking forward to Chris Gayle, the politician.

Mr Gayle: Cheers!



After such an enlightening interview, Chris Gayle left no doubt that he had taken a very logical and well thought out decision. If only we had more people like him coming forward to lead our country, our country could still save itself from the political bedlam that we have today.

Modi Mantra

Indian politics, unlike in more mature western democracies has always been ideology driven, and to a certain extent personality driven. Rather than being issue based or development based, parties have stuck to creating and maintaining vote banks based on intangible ideals like socialism and hindutva. Ideals that can easily serve as a smokescreen for accountability. But as our society matures, the new generation can no longer be attracted by ideology alone.
As mainstream India began to get more knowledgeable, better networked and most importantly gets younger, they no longer remained shackled by the past. Memories of the Independence struggle, of a country finding its feet in the harsh world or of riots and communalism no longer are a factor of whom to vote for. Political parties have been slow, well neigh static in changing to a changing India. A lacuna that the Congress managed to take advantage of for two terms, not consciously, rather by virtue of their own ineptitude. By projecting a leader like Manmohan Singh working under the shadow of Sonia Gandhi, both of whom do not have any ideological standing, the Congress inadvertantly appealed to the young masses. A choice made easy by lack of any viable alternative.
But where there is a void, sooner rather than later, there will be a clamor to fill it up. With the Congress making a royal mess of governance, virtually making their reelection on the continuity plank impossible, and elections only a year away, it was time for someone to step up and try to fill the void. That is when one Mr Narendra Modi decided to strike when the iron is hot.
Modi had started his political career as the very symbol of the hindutva ideology, as a right wing firebrand leader who came to power riding on polarized emotions of a state. Ten years hence, he has converted himself into an icon for the youth, a champion of growth and development. He has shown ambition and hard work, ability to innovate and take prompt decisions. These are traits the upwardly mobile young Indian understand and appreciate. Add to this an ability to communicate effectively with his target audience, be it as an orator or on social networks, and he comes across a breath of fresh air, a person who can connect with the new India and take it forward. His work talks for itself and he talks for himself. Rather than empty rhetoric, he has amassed a whole CV of successes during his tenure as the CM of Gujarat to impress the neutral observer, a breed that is becoming the majority day by day.
Along with his achievements and abilities, another factor than plays to Modi's advantage is the absolute lack of any viable alternative to him. The Congress, by compulsion has hedged its bets on Rahul Gandhi, trying to portray him as a youth icon and harbinger of development. Unfortunately he has neither the charisma nor seems to have the intellectual or leadership abilities to impress. Instead he comes across as a spoilt young man, thriving on his family name and power and with no achievement of his own to speak of. The very antithesis of a youth icon the country has been looking for. Add to that the unholy mess that has been the government of the last few years, with scandal after scandal and minimal achievements to note, economical, social or in foreign policy. To expect another chance at forming the government seems terribly optimistic. The rest of the field consist of regional satraps hedging their bets on a hung government to stake their claim. Their chances are dependent more on permutations and combinations and less on their appeal or abilities at the national level. 2014 is five years too early to consider Arvind Kejrival of the AAP as a contender on the national stage.
This is not to say that Modi's ticket to the prime ministerial post is a done deal. In fact it is not even certain that he will be the candidate his party puts forth for the post. Such is the mechanics of Indian politics. Within the BJP itself, Modi has lots of detractors, those insecure with his growth as well as those justifiably alluding to more senior leaders who deserve a chance of their own. Insecurities fed by his autocratic style of government and the ruthlessness with which he deals with those who oppose him. This brings into question his ability to handle a coalition government, the most possible scenario in 2014. This along with the albatross of the Gujarat riots which still keeps him unacceptable to the minority community and as an extension to the coalition partners of the BJP that depend on the minority vote for their power, ensures that Modi will not have an easy run in.
Will elections still a year away, the Modi camp should be worried that Modi has peaked too early. Today it does not take much for someone to fall from grace, to be a villain one day from the hero the day before. To maintain the momentum that Modi has managed into the election year will need excellent man and media management skills. It takes only one wrong sound byte, one unintended gaffe, one scandal in the news and an image built over years can be shattered. Only time will tell if the Indian public will select him for the top job. As of now he is the candidate who ticks the most boxes.